End of 2025

Instead of having a complicated end of the year recap, I’m thinking of writing a piece on Easy to Fall in Love by Olivia Dean to close out 2025. This year has been extremely loud, so I shouldn’t summarize it with a list of achievements. I’m picking a song, a softer option to sum up 2025. I first heard this song on the radio in December while I was driving to work. I listened to the song as I drove to work, the music was jazz style, warm, but the welcoming didn't immediately hit me. It was different. Most of the songs I listen to nowadays are easy grabs. Those sounded lazy to me, but I listened to them. This song was no check the box for unoriginal songs. It was different. I had forgotten about the first time I heard the song. I heard it again, this time in the middle of traffic on my way back to work, and the road was jammed, my mind tired. A feeling, albeit simple, was visiting my heart once again. This feeling was time away from the road and time listening to the song. My heart warmed. Not breaking, not overwhelmingly happy, just warm. Calm. My mind turned to the songs I had a dry spell from listening to. 

I couldn't listen to Bernadya, and I had to avoid the song Runtuh from Feby Putri. I had to avoid Sasha Alex Sloan - Older and Dancing With Your Ghost, songs I would sit and listen to while I was alone and sing off-key while I cried. My heart had been heavy for a long time, and each of these songs had been a bit of a time capsule I had to avoid. I had to avoid the songs because they would remind me of the sadness, loss, and heartbreak that would open the emotional coin bank. I had to avoid the song Usik as well. Easy to fall in love, however, is a song that I can listen to without a dry spell. The song is easy and invited no memories of loss. It was not a song that invited tears. It was a song that simply opened my heart. Light, easy, love.

This, Easy to Fall in Love sparks a memory from my past. A memory from a time where there was open space to hold a future. A time where loving was a real possibility. Not a sad or painful memory, a happy memory. A memory that puts a smile on my face. I think that is a nice reason to pick that song for the last song of my 2025 calendar year. I think after enduring all I have endured that is a nice reason to pick that song. I think after all that has happened, I do not want to end the year with a countdown to the new year with a list of all the bad things that have happened. I would like to end the year with a positive list of things. I would like to end the year with a confession. A confession that after all the bad things that have happened to me that I still have the ability to emotionally respond to things. That I still have the ability to feel my chest tighten. That I still have the ability for the hope to return that life and love do not have to feel like a constant battle. And for now, that is the end of 2025

enjoy here